Helping Me Get Back Into My Comfort Zone

by Parelli Central on January 27, 2012

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2 Star Junior Parelli Professional Lillan Roquet offered to have this blog, detailing her experience riding with Linda Parelli in Florida, posted here on Parelli Central.  We hope you enjoy it!

The last few days have been all about filming! Upcoming Savvy Club DVDs and a few other exciting things are in the pipeline. I was lucky enough to be a part of it on many different levels, and as always, it’s a journey of self-development, isn’t it?! So, those of you Right-Brain Extroverts who want to commiserate with my ramblings, please continue reading. Everyone else… continue at your own risk!

My grey mare Damo and I were invited to be a part of some of the Savvy Club filming, which was really really exciting! I knew that I would learn a ton! Plus, whatever mistakes I made would only lead to bettering the world for horses anyway, as it gives more opportunities for learning. Not to mention being in the super capable hands of Parelli’s amazing film crew, director Neil Pye and Sue Shoemark, and being taught by none other than Linda Parelli herself! Most of the world would think this would be enough people telling me “you’re okay!”

The Parelli Media Crew, filming our Savvy Club Lesson.

The Parelli Media Crew, filming our Savvy Club Lesson.

The first day went fabulously, and I was playing in the Savvys I was less confident in. Damo was a rock star, acting like such a partner and hanging around all day. The second day we did a Liberty section. This is where my emotional fitness started to let me down. The first thing I noticed was that when Linda started asking me to do specific things or tasks, my focus caused me to lose my draw. What a surprise! One of the human’s mutual responsibilities in the partnership is “understand the natural power of focus.” So as my focus was divided, Damo began to not act like such a partner. Now, with hindsight I can analyze this with a clear head and realize that my liberty used to consist of me seeing lots of hind legs and tail straight in the air and a horse galloping away – AFTER she had busted through the round pen! So when I say that I lost our mental connection, I mean to say I had to use a lot of disengagements to keep her with me, because I lacked draw, because my focus was off, and I wasn’t being a good leader!

This was all well and good, and we kept it together and finished the filming. But I was pretty bummed and trying to kick myself in the pants and get back into an emotionally fit state! Not to much avail. Here was my Parelli Connect update after that session:

Lillan Roquet with Andiamo, (Liberty, 45 mins) Today we played with the weave at Liberty. Damo was AWESOME … My focus was really off :( . She did really well as long as I gave her my total attention … but when Linda started tasking us, I lost mental connection with Damo and then I had to use a bunch of disengagements to force the draw back to me! YUCK!

I spent most of the rest of the morning stewing, feeling like I didn’t do right by my horse because I wasn’t upholding my responsibilities. I felt like I kinda got myself together after lunch so I thought that I would go out and have a ride with Linda and all of the senior instructors here studying with her. And here’s what happened next:

Lillan Roquet with Andiamo, (Freestyle, 45 mins) Played with getting a forward canter today. She did better than she Has EVER done … so of course I pushed it :( . Too far. Lost her mind and she started spooking, and getting way impulsive … at one point I weighted my inside stirrup and my saddle slid almost completely off :( … I did an emergency dismount … but also had to pull on her face too much to stop and broke a bunch of her confidence in GOC.

Linda says I need to play with maintaining gait first (which should have been obvious to me: “maintain gait … then direction”). She suggested using the round pen, where she can go fast and I don’t have to steer. Then take her up for a lap or two, then bring her back to a trot, etc,  until she gets more confidence and stays connected with the speed I want.

Damo, my wonderful horse.

Damo, my wonderful horse.

As you can see, it was not my most successful ride! Again… into that terrible spiral of being disappointed with myself for not having more savvy and being a better partner, and then being disappointed for being disappointed!

So then came the realizations. I got home and just blurted it all out onto Parelli Connect. I almost deleted it, then thought, “No one will read it anyway,” so I left it up there. Then my brain came back to me. Writing all those emotions down, processing the disappointment at not being the partner I want to be to a horse that has given me SO much, caused me to start looking for theory. So of course in Parelli I could find so much to bring me back. That is where my realizations about focus, responsibilities (maintain gait, THEN direction) clarity of leadership, etc came from. And of course the realization: discomfort is learning!

So… I learned that knowledge can help us to find our way back into our comfort zone. “Frustration begins where knowledge ends.” And luckily we have this AMAZING program to help us out of our comfort zone … and then the theory to help us find our way back in.

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From Australia to Pagosa: A Fast Track Story

by IsabelleGreenfield on January 26, 2012

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Antoinette Archer wrote this excellent blog describing her journey and experience at the Parelli Campus in Pagosa Springs, Colorado last summer.

It all started with a phone call at 4:00 in the morning, as I was rubbing my eyes trying to comprehend what I was hearing. “This is Ryan Rose from Parelli, do you know who I am?” I thought I was dreaming! I wasn’t… I was one lucky girl, to be given the opportunity of a lifetime, to go to Pat and Linda Parelli’s ranch in Pagosa Springs to attend a Fast Track. It all happened so fast, without warning, but of course I embraced it. As I approached the ranch, I saw the symbol that we have learned to love; how unbelievable… I was really there. People call this the Gateway to Horsemanship.

I arrived!

I arrived!

The ranch was everything I expected and more. Check-in was full of many excited people and horses coming from afar. In the August Fast Track, there were about 35 people. I am very lucky to have met many new Parelli friends from all over the globe.

Our head instructor was Ryan Rose, who was assisted by Australia’s own Tanya Bennett and Bonnie McIntyre. Each had their own style and experiences but each one of them made us all feel so welcome and helped and challenged us during our savvy stay.

I had a wonderful lease horse, Caballero, a nine-year-old Arab – I have added him to Parelli Connect if you want to see our journey together. He was such a wonderful, super athletic horse who tried his heart out for me. He was pretty confident and offered me a lot. He loved the Touch It Game and offered his foot on everything and anything. He was very good at putting his feet on things and was able to get all four feet on a railway sleeper and inside a tractor tire!

Caballero, demonstrating his talent!

Caballero, demonstrating his talent!

I don’t think I realized what I learned at the ranch just until recently. The course was about doing things excellently – what we should all strive for. How good is your Phase 1? It should be a whisper (unseen to the untrained eye). And do you really mean it? I truly believe my knowledge has been embedded at an entirely new, deeper level. One thing that really resonates with me was “Get in harmony with them, so they can get in harmony with us.” That was Ryan’s mantra, and I now feel it is the fundamental of natural horsemanship. This way your horse has the opportunity and the choice to stay connected. If you are interesting and provocative enough, your horse won’t want to lose that connection. If you get the mind, you will get the feet; this works for everything (On Line, Liberty, Freestyle and Finesse).

While in Pagosa, I was lucky enough to watch Ryan and the savvy team give a demonstration at the local show and also a demonstration that the Externs had prepared for us. Pat and Caton also competed in a cutting competition not far away; we got to hear about the Wild Horse Taming event in Reno and got to see Linda and her magnificent horses.

I was also able to compete in the Parelli games and we got Level 4 ribbons for On Line, Liberty and Freestyle – boy was I surprised! We got a few other ribbons for the times games, which was great fun.

There was so much to see and do, from the Mighty Bronc seat builder and riding past Scooch Mountain to having a BBQ and singing along with Pat and Linda at the campfire, as well as playing volleyball in the arena and soaking in the hot springs. A big thanks to Pat and Linda for creating such an amazing program, and to all the instructors that have assisted me in my journey towards being the best me – and horse person – I can be, and showing me the pathway of never-ending self-improvement.

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Horses & Husbands: A Conversation With Jamie Greenebaum

by Jolene McDowell on January 25, 2012

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Have you noticed most of the people on Parelli Connect are women? So where are all the men?

Jamie: My husband is not a rider. I started to say “not a horse lover,” but that is not quiet true. While he is not comfortable around them himself, he totally supports my horse addiction, even enabling it.

I broke my arm a few years ago when Cici was stung by a bee on her belly and leapt in the air. I fell to the ground. As I was waiting for the bones to heal, Robert drove me to the barn every day. “Take as long as you need,” he’d tell me, and he’d sit in the car reading a book. I would sit in the paddock with Cici and Casey.

“Why are you doing this? I know how upset you are about the accident and how you blame Cici,” I’d say. His response? “You need horse time to completely heal.”

Jo said: What a heartwarming story, Jamie. A few years ago I was in the running for first place in State in my Hunter-Jumper division. Every competition counted. The week of our biggest competition, I got a call from my son, saying their second child was on the way. I wrote off the competition and hopped on a plane, arriving into town before the baby. I was privileged to spend the week with them, helping out.

Mentally I had given up the competition, but as my plane landed back in Salt Lake City, my trainer called. “The competition is running late,” she said, “and if you hurry, you can make it.” I started to tell her I was just getting off the plane when my husband buzzed thru saying, “Honey, I have been watching this competition and it’s running late. I got your clothes (out of the dirty clothes), I’ve warmed up your horse, and I think we can make it if you drive straight there.” I told my trainer, drove straight to the competition, changed in the back of the trailer, and got to the ring 30 seconds before my turn in the arena.

I think what we’re both trying to say is that whether they ride or not, whether they practice Parelli or not, it’s hard to do horses without support, and husbands can be a remarkable support.

Jamie said: I’ve noticed posts on Parelli Connect regarding husbands. How they have given their wives the opportunity to reconnect with their dream of horses. How they build things such as barns and slow feeders. Dig post holes and put up fencing. Even go ranch shopping! And how they are there for their horse-crazy women.

Jo said: My husband calls himself “A Desperate Horse Husband,” but it’s always with a smile on his face.

We have different styles. He’s an old cowboy type who was riding bareback from childhood. I think it’s important to support each other respectfully, no matter what our styles. While my husband doesn’t “practice Parelli,” I did notice him saying “Well, Parelli says . . .” when a friend mentioned a problem with his horse the other day. He had it right, so I just walked away quietly with a smile on my face.

Jamie said: I think my husband would agree with “Desperate Horse Husband!” While he is not involved with horses, he often tells me to “go to the barn.” I pause and thank him for his willingness to share me with my horses.

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Petra’s Pick – The Power of Music

January 24, 2012

I have to admit, I love Facebook! Spending about half an hour on Facebook every day, I talk to all kinds of people from all over the world. I post things that I find valuable and want to share, and I check in with friends and students all the time. One of my shares a [...]

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Horses For Heroes

January 23, 2012

Erin Fowle, 2-Star Junior Instructor, sent us this inspiring write-up about an organization that is truly changing the world for horses and humans – right in her own backyard! We hope you enjoy it. I live in the 3rd largest California county, near the Oregon border, with the 4th smallest population. Our unemployment rates are [...]

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Finding The Perfect Partner at the Cardinal Ranch

January 20, 2012

Denyse Rousselet sent us this account of finding her Left-Brain Extrovert mare, Sweet Indiana, at the Cardinal Ranch in Canada.  Sometimes the perfect horse/human partnerships just fall into place! We hope you enjoy this blog. Having owned two horses, my first an Appaloosa mare and later on a Dutch Warmblood gelding who was retired at [...]

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Farrier Day at the Farm

January 19, 2012

It was farrier’s day yesterday, and I had all the horses prepared and lined up ready for their monthly pedicure. It was a great opportunity for me to observe my horses and learn a real a lesson in Horsenality™. Each horse responded differently according to their past experiences, innate characteristics and spirit! First came Cisco, [...]

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How ‘The Horse Place’ Got My Horsemanship Back On Track

January 18, 2012

Parelli student – and former Social Media intern – Kerrin Koetsier sent us this this fantastic blog about what she did to get outside of her comfort zone. We hope you enjoy it! As a Parelli student, I have become very familiar with the concept of comfort zones. The idea is that learning and development [...]

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Transcendence at the Parelli Campus: Part Two

January 17, 2012

This is Part II of Kat Green‘s blog series, Transcendence at the Parelli Campus.  Here’s Part I.  We hope you enjoy the conclusion to this wonderful blog! Circling close went slow at first, which was perfect for me to explain ending on a good note and being particular about what I wanted whenever I came [...]

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The Rewards of Keeping Your Mind in the Present

January 16, 2012

I think that a lot of folks are in a constant state of searching for happiness. This is a human struggle that can consume us. What brings you happiness? We spend so much time focusing on the things that make us feel bad. We spend our time focusing on the things we don’t want versus [...]

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